She died in early December and I will admit, I was saddened by the news. It didn’t matter that we all knew her death was inevitable…cancer ensured that. Still, that knowledge didn’t make it any easier and her death was one that could be mourned regardless of your political opinion.
For Elizabeth, I ached. I pitied her, but that always gave way to admiration. She was stalwart in her personal battle to live and die as she chose. I respected her, but I can’t say that for the man she married, a truly arrogant sociopath in my opinion. That’s why I couldn’t help but smile when I learned that the will she signed days before her death last month makes no mention of her estranged husband and two-time presidential candidate John Edwards.
Elizabeth Edwards left all her possessions to her three surviving children. That should come as no surprise, really. The Edwards separated early last year after 32 years of marriage. John Edwards admitted he fathered a child during an affair with a former campaign worker.
That’s when he wasn’t blowing campaign dollars on hundred-dollar haircuts.
John Edwards’ idiocy has never ceased to amaze me. The man is a decent head of hair with the integrity of a polyp. That’s all. He’s a handsome face that morphs into something incredibly ugly and grotesque once you get to know more about him. I’ve never laid eyes on him, but I wouldn’t need to in order to know that vapidity completely engulfs his baby blues. His lack of substance is amazing. That he made it as far as he did politically is a testament to his cunning pathology.
If you wonder about my vitriol, it’s deeply rooted. I’ve been the daughter of and the girlfriend of infidelity more times than I care to admit. It creates a searing pain, like red-hot metal to skin and it brands one bitter and cynical. That said, I will always indict John Edwards in my own court of opinion, no matter what he does. That’s his penance in Laurie Kendrick’s penal system. In my eyes, he’ll never be able to recover from this heinousness. And while I questioned Elizabeth for staying with him as long as she did, I applauded her for leaving when she did because she left as her illness was winning the battle. That had to have been egregiously difficult. I would like to think she did it out of principle. I would like to think this allowed her to die feeling less physically and emotionally encumbered by that man and his thoughtless, selfish actions.
And all of this happened–the affair, the very public betrayal, the realization that a child had been fathered and all of the ensuing humiliation–as she was being handed a death sentence. But sheer will took over; she courageously died on her own terms. In doing so, there was victory in her life’s defeat.
So rest well, Elizabeth. You’ve earned that right.
Hold your son, Wade in your arms and greet the eternal light, free of the things that others instigated in your lives. No more pain, sadness, fear, want or loneliness.
We asked for signs
the signs were sent:
the birth betrayed
the marriage spent
Yeah the widowhood
of every government —
signs for all to see.
Ring the bells that still can ring …
Forget your perfect offering
There is a crack, a crack in everything
That’s how the light gets in.
–Leonard Cohen, “Anthem”