Laurie Plus Kate = Hate
Actually, hate is such a strong word. But in this case, not overtly.
You see, I never liked the TLC reality show featuring the Gosselins–a couple who played Frankenstein to create life and sorry if that offends, but as I see it, that’s what they did. I’ve never had that maternal urge to procreate so perhaps I can’t even really comment about that, but it still bothers me from an ethical standpoint—I think. I’m really not sure what it was about this couple, but it was something and whatever it was, it bothered me from the very beginning.
And in the beginning, Jon and Kate were just your typical Pennsylvania couple who had twin girls. She was a nurse; he was in IT, but something felt incomplete. They wanted more children. Kate’s ability to conceive was compromised by Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome . and fertility treatments were the only ways to ensure Jon would get that son he wanted.
Well, he got what he wanted…and then some. Alexis Faith, Hannah Joy, Aaden Jonathan, Collin Thomas, Leah Hope and Joel Kevin were born just shy of 30-weeks gestation.
The Gosseli’s were an interesting couple, business wise; the kind TV execs in the New Millenium like. Kate is cute. She kinda has that “girl next door” thing going and Jon is cute in his own right and bears more of the ethnocentric facial features of his Korean mom rather than his French and Welsh father. The twins and the sextuplets do as well. This was very appealing to TLC. They were “the new face of the American family”. So, the Gosselin’s understood the financial parameters involved in having their own reality show and considering they had to raise eight children, I understand their reasoning, though I just don’t see how having a camera crew record so much of your day-to-day lives can be a good thing.
I believe we all know how that worked out for them.
I don’t know what Jon and Kate’s marriage was like before the lights, the cameras and the action, but of the few shows I watched, it seemed to steadily deteriorate as the seasons unfolded.
And I have a feeling that Kate was really efforting to be civil here. When the cameras aren’t rolling I would imagine the sleeves get rolled up, the expletives fly and the decibels increase. There are other moments I can remember Kate nagging Jon, to the point where it was extremely uncomfortable to watch.
So I stopped watching altogether.
And here’s where my opinion on this whole thing gets a little convoluted.
I can empathize with a tired woman who has eight children and a husband that is slow to react; seemingly lacks any real personality, is a dullard and seems a bit slow and dim-witted at times. I would think that based on the little interaction I’ve witnessed, Kate is probably somewhat smarter than Jon. If this is true, this would be a point of frustration for an already frazzled mom.
If this is true, then it’s obviously a HUGE bone of contention and source of resentment for the man constantly reminded of his shortcomings–and in front of millions of viewers. Jon is probably also aware that he isn’t as smart as Kate, but smart enough to know he didn’t like being reminded of it on national TV. As you saw in the video, Kate doesn’t hold her tongue.
A man with a healthy male ego is not going to tolerate being whittled down like that, especially in such a public forum.
So, he had an affair. That seems to be the ultimate “fuck you” for men (and yes, spare me the comments–women do this too) but this seems to be a fairly common reaction of men who tire of their marriages to stronger, smarter women, because that’s exactly what they needed–at age 24. Twelve years later at 36, not so much. People change, some grow; others don’t and every marriage will be affected by everything that happens be it abject changes or even if the marriage does nothing but stagnate. Every thing affects a union.
I abhor infidelity. It’s devastated my life, but it seems that publically humiliating a strong woman (a nagger which Kate had down to a science) with a very public affair seems to be a very typical; a very common counter strike for her offenses. And let’s face it, what will hurt a woman worse? Another woman.
The problem with Jon and Kate is (and sadly many other couples are guilty of this, too) they were both incredibly wrong on how both handled their marriage…especially its ending. Every time she ripped into him out of her frustration and her lack of discipline and appreciation for what she was doing to him, he allowed a chunk of his integrity to fall off his psychic wagon because he couldn’t empathize with what she was going through. She didn’t realize that every insult was amounting to a mortal blow to her marriage. They wounded each other by being exceedingly selfish and refusing to see the role they played in the dissolution of their relationship. In many ways, the dissolution of the union was textbook, except for the camera crews. I firmly believe Kate was a shrew long before motherhood. She married a dolt and that dolt needed a strong woman to fill his voids.
And that my friends, is ALWAYS a recipe for failure.
And now Kate has become this media gadfly, lauded simply for that temporary housing unit we call her uterus. She’s ubiquitous from what I understand. Everywhere–on “The View, the morning news shows…everyone wanting to know how Kate Gosselin balances her life as a new celebrity, a divorced single mother of eight, an author, a motivational speaker and now a Dancer With Stars.
Am I the only one who finds this a little repulsive? I’m not sure why it bothers me so, but it does. Especially when I hear Kate says she has to do her” job”. Her job? What’s her “job”? Celebrity is a gig? Does the IRS recognize that as a career?
When I heard her say that once it galled me as much as it did when I heard Madonna refer to herself as ‘an artist and what she does, is “her craft”.
Recording a song in a controlled studio environment with an engineer applying loads of effect on her voice–more so than anything we’ve heard on an Alvin and the Chipmunks cartoon ain’t singing and going on stage and doing the occasional shuffle ball change ain’t dancing.
Artist my ass.
However, I can’t fault Kate for trying to support her large family. Federal statistics indicate she’s in for a hell of an uphill struggle. Child rearing isn’t cheap. Even for low-income families, the cost to raise a child from birth to age 17 can cost upwards of 200 thousand dollars. If you’re in the upper financial echelons, it can cost closer to 300K. OK, let’s operate on that proviso for a sec. Kate will probably get custody and Jon will have to help financially . That means they’ll both have to work–a lot–and will have to multiply that 300K figure by eight and according to my 99 Cent Store calculator, that means J&K will have to come up with a whopping 2.4 million dollars just to get their kids through high school. I haven’t EVEN figured in college, extra security and nannies the kids will require and I would imagine, we’ll have to include psychological counseling for all eight must be figured in there somewhere.
Kate would never earn that as a nurse. Jon couldn’t make that doing whatever he does, so the choice for Kate was simple: capitalize on her reality show fame…or sell drugs. She chose the former. Besides, she already had a foot in the door. People seemed interested in her brand. It made sense.
I also understand that Kate has recently admitted that she regrets some of the things she says, especially in regard to her ex-husband John Gosselin, even when they were still married.
“Much of what I said to Jon was unwarranted. I could have guarded my tongue better,” she admits in her latest book — a sentiment brought to light on a recent interview on the “Today” show.
“I learned that in the heat of the moment I have a sharp tongue,” she told Meredith Vieira. “Looking back there are probably a lot of people that I love that I probably spoke to inappropriately. Those are the people that are beside you to support you and love you. I’ve really learned to watch what I say.”
OK Kate, I’ll give you that much, but I still don’t like you. And I don’t apologize for not liking you, nor will I lose sleep over my inability to pinpoint precisely the reason why I don’t. I don’t like that former sperm donor of yours, either. You both kind of repulse me.
And I’ll also admit that despite my feelings, I don’t blame you for knowing you have to work–just please, shut up about it. Seriously, we’re bored with learning that you’re a working mom after dancing on a TV show. And one more thing, Katie–you’re lucky; not talented and let’s not even pretend for one minute that you’re anything but a an all right looking flash in the pan; a temporary flavor of the month produced by the Baskin Robbins-like star making machinery throwing darts at your career highlight reel in some darkened network boardroom.
You’re a product. A creation. This time, the networks injected the fertility drugs to give your career multiple chances at fame.
And now that I think about it, that’s one of the main reasons I resent you-I don’t like what you represent. There are a lot of working moms out there with kids too who can’t get two thousand dollar hair extensions, write books, appear on “The View” and “Today”, dance a pas de deux on ABC while wearing shiny gold lamé gowns and shell out tens of thousands of dollars for nannies and cooks and tutors and whatever else is needed to cover the cost of being an absentee mother who’s just “doing her job”.
No, most moms can barely afford to feed their kids.
Plus, I don’t know you, but I get the feeling that you’re rather cold, aloof and not a very nice person. I do however feel with some degree of certainty that you’ve become a fame whore, Kate and I predict that this won’t end well.
But it will end.
So go ahead, work ‘at your job’ and then take a much-needed break from the make-up chair before your sixth appearance on Larry King this week and check that new diamond studded Piaget your recent book deal allowed you to buy. Look closely. You’re at minute 14 and a half.
And I sincerely hope your watch runs fast.