What I Post When I Ain’t Got Nuthin’ Else

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In case you nmissed the news, I’m a working girl again.   

No, not a street walker or a two-bit boulevard whore.    I’m legit;  I get taxes taken out and everything.  I am a woman who works in an office–not at some street corner and I work with other decent women and several men, none of which are named “John”, thank  you very much.

I do a lot of writing at my job and it is incumbant on me to come up with little creative slogans and campaigns.  I’m like Darren Stevens (the first Darren) during a typical day at McMann and Tate.  The only difference is my jaw -it’s much less pronounced and well, unlike that Darren, I’m still alive.  One of my assignments is for the African nation of Chad which needs a little help in the PR department.

My suggestion is to change the name of the country to “Jeremy”.

Two..three..four…

My older readers with a nostalgic love of 60’s pop duos will love that one.

But I digress.

Not long ago, I supped with a friend and New Age weirdness came up in the conversation. Seems my friend is into numerology and thought you, my readers  would be entertained if I wrote a post on this numbers game crap.

Considering the workweek is new and I’ve got subterfuge to plan, I thought you might like a primer on numerology. You might learn what your birthday says about you, other than it being a source of scourge for your mother, not to mention a lamentable day for her poor, haggard uterus.

OK..kids listen up: if you believe this stuff, your birth number can in fact, say a lot about you. It (supposedly) describes who you are, what you’re good at and what your “inborn” abilities are.. It also points to what we’ve learned and what we have yet to take in as knowledge.

Wanna know your birth number?

To figure that out, add all the numbers in your total birth date together until there’s only one digit. remaining. See the example below. The numerical month, plus date plus year.

Example: March 20, 1950

3 + 20 + 1950 = 1973
1 + 9 + 7 + 3 = 20
2 + 0 = 2
2 is the Birth Number

So, what do the numbers mean?

Well, the Birth Number doesn’t prevent you from being anything you want. I am told it’ll just color your choice differently. That is…IF you let it.

By the way, The Laurie in all my exotic regality is a “5”.    This is utter horse shit. I don’t believe this crock for a minute . Nonsense. Crap. Balderdash.

Especially when everyone knows I’m MUCH more of a 3.

# 1 THE ORIGINATOR

1’s are originals. Coming up with new ideas and executing them is natural. Doing things their own way is another trait that gets them labeled as being stubborn and arrogant. 1’s are extremely honest and loyal and values a secret. They often have the best of diplomacy skills. They like to take the initiative and are often leaders or bosses, as they like to be the best. They tend to be very responsible and knowledgeable and calculate their own moves; therefore, they hold others accountable for their actions. Sometimes unforgiving. Being self-employed is definitely helpful for them.

Famous 1’s: Tom Hanks, Robert Redford, Hulk Hogan, Carol Burnett, Wynona Judd, Nancy Reagan, Raquel Welch.

# 2 THE PEACEMAKER
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2’s are the born diplomats. They are aware of others’ needs and moods and often think of others before themselves. Naturally analytical and very intuitive they don’t like to be alone. Friendship and companionship is very important and can lead them to be successful in life, but on the other hand they’d rather be alone than in an uncomfortable relationship. Being naturally shy they should learn to boost their self-esteem and express themselves freely and seize the moment and not put things off.

Famous 2’s: President Bill Clinton, Madonna, Whoopie Goldberg, Thomas Edison, Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart.

# 3 THE LIFE OF THE PARTY
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3’s are idealists. They are very creative, social, charming, romantic and easygoing. They start many things, but don’t always see them through. They like others to be happy and go to great lengths to achieve it. They are very popular and idealistic. They should learn to see the world from a more realistic point of view.

Famous 3’s: Alan Alda, Ann Landers, Bill Cosby, Melanie Griffith, Salvador Dali, Jody Foster.

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# 4 THE CONSERVATIVE
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4’s are sensible and traditional. They like order and routine. They only act when they fully understand what they are expected to do. They like getting their hands dirty and working hard.They are attracted to the outdoors and feel an affinity with nature.They are prepared to wait and can be stubborn and persistent. Theyshould learn to be more flexible and to be nice to themselves.

Famous 4’s: Neil Diamond, Margaret Thatcher, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Tina Turner, Paul Hogan, Oprah Winfrey.

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# 5 THE NONCONFORMIST
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5’s are the explorers. Their natural curiosity, risk taking, and enthusiasm often lands them in hot water. They need diversity, and don’t like to be stuck in a rut. The whole world is their school and they see a learning possibility in every situation. The questions never stop. They are well advised to look before they take action and make sure they have all the facts before jumping to conclusions.

Famous 5’s: Abraham Lincoln, Charlotte Bronte, Jessica Walter, Vincent Van Gogh, Bette Midler, Helen Keller, Mark Hamil and of course, Laurie Kendrick.

# 6 THE ROMANTIC
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6’s are idealistic and need to feel useful to be happy. A strong family connection is important to them. Their emotions influence their decisions. They have a strong urge to take care of others and to help. They are very loyal and make great teachers. They like art or music. They make loyal friends who take the friendship seriously. 6’s should learn to differentiate between what they can change and what they cannot.

Famous 6’s: Albert Einstein, Jane Seymour, John Denver, Meryl Streep, Christopher Columbus, Goldie Hawn.

#7 THE INTELLECTUAL
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7’s are the searchers. Always probing for hidden information, they find it difficult to accept things at face value. Emotions don’t sway their decisions. Questioning everything in life, they don’t like to be questioned themselves. They’re never off to a fast start, and their motto is slow and steady wins the race. They come across as philosophers and being very knowledgeable, and sometimes as loners. They are technically inclined and make great researchers uncovering information. They like secrets. They live in their own world and should learn what is acceptable and what not in the world at large.

Famous 7’s: William Shakespeare, Lucille Ball, Michael Jackson, Joan Baez, Princess Diana.

# 8 THE BIG SHOT
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8’s are the problem solvers. They are professional, blunt and to the point, have good judgement and are decisive. They have grandiose plans and like to live the good life. They are take charge people. They view people objectively. They let you know in no uncertain terms that they are the boss. They should learn to base their decisions on their own needs rather that on what others want.

Famous 8’s: Edgar Cayce, Barbara Streisand, George Harrison, Jane Fonda, Pablo Picasso, Aretha Franklin, Nostrodamus

#9 THE PERFORMER

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9’s are natural entertainers. They are very caring and generous, giving away their last dollar to help. With their charm, they have no problem making friends and nobody is a stranger to them. They have so many different personalities that people around them have a hard time understanding them. They are like chameleons, ever changing and blending in. They have tremendous luck, but also can suffer from extremes in fortune and mood. To be successful, they need to build a loving foundation.

Famous 9’s: Albert Schweitzer, Shirley MacLaine, Harrison Ford, Gloria Steinem, Jimmy Carter, Elvis Presley

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One comment

  1. Thought I might help with your slogan quest, how about “Surf Chad,” I know that it’s landlocked but hey, it worked for Maui. As for the numbers stuff, I’m with you. I guess the best way to put it – it simply does not add up.

    Congrats on the job,

    MHB

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