Should we  assume  when a nationally known pet food manufacturer insists that it’s new, improved product now  has a new and improved taste, they’re telling the truth?    Does the phrase,  “four out of five dogs prefer the flavor of new and improved  Beasty Chunks”, actually make a difference to you and your shopping list?

When the ad proclaims, “Hey kids, tell your mom you want Chunk o’Chocolate, now with 25% more Brazil nuts!”     Do your kids hear the commercial and then jump up and spell out “Hurrah” in semafore?     Or are most kids up and dictionary bound to find out what they heck a Brazil nut is?


“OxyWash now has Freindium Paranoidathol cystals.   Just don’t get none onya”., says the announcer. Mr. Big Voice.    Then you think you yourself,  “It’ll kill my family, but By God, my clothes with be cleaner and brighter than ever!!”

We are all humans, I think.  That being the case, why is there a part of our consciousness that believes a good part of everything we’re told?  Why do we beleive a great deal of everything we hear?  

Because when it’s new and improved and promises love and hopes and dreams, we desperately want to believe it’s true.

Or is there another part of us that’s just  the opposite?  We doubt the sincerity of any and every thing  that we’re fed?   We’ve become just that jaded??  

I’ve often thought about cops and detectives, who deal with liars on a hourly basis..   They develop a sixth sense about the truth and the people attempting to extol it.    Suddenly, lies become palpable.   They can hear a lie being told from a mile away and in a way, seasoned cops can almost feel them.  They have texture.

There are those who can lie at the drop of a hat.  But the world consists of smart people who are stupid liars. The bad liars, you’re embarassed for them, but the good liars…they”re impressive.   To watch them at work is something to behold.   They don’t need to preface everything they say with a very pregnant, “Uh………….” at the beginning of every lie- filled sentence.    They’re smart enough to pull from their mental quivers one of a million different scenarios they have their disposal.  And this brilliant recall happens in less than a fraction of a second.  Amazing, really.

One more thing:   never lie to a liar who’s smarter than you.   You’ll lose every time.

Some men will turn on the romantic charm  and promise the moon for a crotch conqeust.  Anything to seal the deal, while many women, play the fairer sex, femme fatale bit to the hilt.  We know when and how to become completely obsequious and allow our men to engorge their egos,  as we allow them to think that they, the rulers of the roost, are smart and wise and the fixer of all things broken and/malaligned.   

Women.  We’re a brilliant species, really.   Far more advanced in many, many ways and I don’t say that just because I am one.

We have to be manipulative and able to cajole, gear and steer at the drop of a hat.   Men , now you can snipe  all you want, but I firmly believe that  you’re  happier men as a result of this.   Your egos need our bolstering.    And it’s really not all that one-sided.  Actually, we’re all aware,  at least subconsciously so,  of what we’re doing to each other.   It’s in our genetic coding for men to woo and women to wow.   You know, quid pro quo.  Ultimately, a woman’s intrusion supports the man’s intrustion.   It was all part of the divine plan.

Then, there’s that old adage that we’ve heard forever.  “You can’t teach an old dog new tricks”.   That’s even more of a reality for people.    If a woman is a steadfast liar at say…age 45 and has been for decades, unless a dramatic life  altering event occurs forcing her to change,  she’ll  always remain a lying, scheming bag of nag.  

If a middle aged man is and always has been a sociopath, completely devoid of empathy, sympathy and concern; a compulsive liar, delusional, selfish,  lives all alone and presents agoraphobic tendencies because he has the social skills and personality of a traffic cone, and therefore, frightened to death of intimacy and ONLY allows his self involvment in his “work”  to be his only consort, well, he isn’t going to change either.

Gee, that was oddly specific …

I’d like to hear from you.   Tell me your horror stories.  I want to learn about the strangest, weirdest, most mentally fractured whack job, Hitlerian thinking, virulent jerk you’ve ever  dated, ever were engaged to, married to or paired with at work.  And tell me how you  broke it off, ended it, got out of it, etc.  The demented partner can be male, female, gender debatable, I really don’t care.  

Basically, I just don’t want to feel all alone and that stupid.

Thanks for your input.



  1. If someone tells you a tale that you are sure is complete bullshit, ask them to give you the details again in reverse order. If it’s true they will, if it’s not………they can’t do it.

    Yep. So now Dux, as requested, please tell me about that crazy bitch you almost married

  2. I’m pretty sure I know exactly what you are talking about, Laurie. If not, then the coincidence is spectacular. Shoot me an email?

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